The “Power” star and the father of her child split three months after their daughter was born, and the breakup left her “devastated.”
“I didn’t tell anybody about our breakup for two years, because I was embarrassed and ashamed,” she wrote, per MadameNoire.
“You know in your heart when you’re not happy and when you’re feeling undervalued. As soon as you realize that you are settling or conceding your worth, you have to make a move. Check in with yourself and say, “Wait a minute. Is this what I want? Is this who I really am?”
She also noted that her idea of a perfect relationship “may not be God’s plan for me right now.”
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“The truth is, I was afraid to become a mother, and I honestly did not feel ready. I was uncertain about my relationship and unsure if I was going to get married. I wanted to have this perfect life because I had seen it in movies and my parents have been married for 48 years. Then it hit me: The perfect life that I envisioned may not be God’s plan for me right now, and it’s okay to be on my own journey as long as my daughter is healthy and happy.”
Naturi also had to be honest about what she actually needs in a man.
“As women, sometimes we say, ‘Well, I don’t want to be with him because he’s not this or he’s not that.’ But sometimes it’s not about what he is or isn’t. It’s about what you need, sis. That’s another valuable lesson I’ve learned. I made a difficult choice to end a relationship because I had to put my own needs first.”
Now, the actress is completely focused on co-parenting with Ben.
“Right now co-parenting is what’s important to my ex and me. We may no longer be together, but we’d like to make sure that the respect is still there. Zuri needs to have a strong and healthy relationship with her father.”
She also has this message for single moms: “Being a single mother doesn’t have to mean you’re unhappy: I bought my first home a few years ago, I star on Power and I’m dating again. I didn’t get married, and I don’t have a fairy-tale love story (yet), but I’m stronger than ever and having fun too.”