Teresa Caldwell, Bow Wow’s Mother, Talks Surviving Domestic Violence

*Teresa Caldwell, the mother of rapper Bow Wow, is speaking out about surviving domestic violence amid the re-release of her book, “I Once Was Her.”

Speaking to ESSENCE, Caldwell is bringing attention to her truth to inspire others during Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

“I’m a survivor, and I felt like I could help another survivor. Why not tell my story and share my experiences and what I’ve learned? No one ever taught me to love, so I wanted to share my story, hoping that I can help at least one person,” Caldwell told the outlet. 

“I saw my mom being abused, so I thought that that meant love, that meant they cared about me, and a lot of women feel like that. We have to talk about it more, because even for me, I was ashamed,” she shared. “I didn’t even want my son to know my story. We have to talk about it, and it’s ok to get a therapist. I did and spent so much time and money on trying to fix myself, to protect my son and make sure that he didn’t have to go through what I went through.”

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Caldwell noted that she re-released her book now “because my launch date was right in the middle of the pandemic, and I couldn’t really promote it before because of COVID.”

Check out additional excerpts from her conversation with ESSENCE below.

What advice do you have for those who are suffering from domestic abuse?

People always say, “why can’t you just leave?” It’s not that simple. It’s hard. My advice would be to talk to someone that you really trust, somebody who’s not going to judge you. I formed a plan, and the person that I talked with helped me form this plan, and that’s how I was able to get out. I always tell people, “You’re not alone in this.” There are so many women, and men too, and children that experience this unfortunately.

You just mentioned that your mom was a victim. What can be done to break this vicious cycle?

I want to emphasize again that you have to talk about it. You have to get help. Getting a therapist really helped me, because, if you don’t fix the issue, you will bring that issue to whatever relationship you’re in. If you have abandonment issues, you will bring them into your next relationship, and it’s hard dealing with a person who struggles from abandonment or being a survivor of domestic violence. Even now, if somebody talks to me in a certain type of tone, I feel like I have got to protect myself and a shield goes up.

Speaking of empowerment, what can we as Black women can do to empower ourselves, and what is something that you do to empower yourself?

I am a true, strong believer and am very, very, very spiritual. I have a really deep connection with God, and I allow God to guide my steps. I don’t do anything unless I pray on it. I know my worth today, but I didn’t always know my worth. Now, I know who I am, and I know what I bring to the table. I don’t allow anything negative into my soul. If you sent me a long text message and I know that it’s negative, I will delete it and won’t even read it. With social media, I don’t even read anything.

For empowering others, I’m always down to support my sisters and my brothers, and I think that we as women need to do more uplifting of one another and I think we need to support each other more, especially in the Black community.

What do you hope that readers will take away after finishing your book?

I would love for them to take away that she went through a lot and look at where she is now. Know your worth, put in the work, and that pain is temporary. You have control over you. Again, the pain doesn’t last forever. You have the choice and the ability to change that, because I did, and I hope to inspire that in others.

Read the full interview here.

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