Tuesday, April 20, 2021

Cory A. Haywood: Chivalry is Dead … and Women Killed It: My Response to Quavo and Saweetie’s Elevator Scuffle, and the Gender War it’s Causing on Social Media

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*Here’s my impression of two females watching Quavo and Saweetie’s “elevator fight” video:

“Oh girl, did you see him yank that bag away from her hand?”

“Yeah girl, that trifling nigga made her fall. Omg. That’s not love. He’s toxic.”

“I mean … she did throw a punch, but that’s cause she was tired of him mistreating her!”

“I know, girl! And it don’t matter what she did! That’s not how you treat women. If we punch, kick, bite, stab, stone, shoot, or throw acid on a nigga – he’s supposed to be A MAN and walk away. It’s only acid! I mean, dang, wipe it off.”

“Yaasss queen! Look at all this melanin! We’re royalty! These niggas ain’t shit. Quavo a hot mess – tryna take something he bought her. Boop! He cancelled.”

🤦🏾‍♂‍

That’s right. It’s called “hood-rat logic.”

When I first heard about the video, I didn’t even bother watching it.

Instead, I went looking for details (and slander) on Twitter.

It didn’t take long for me to find dozens of comments from angry female trolls who clearly need their eyes inspected.

There’s no way they watched the same video I did – because I saw two people tugging at the same bag. Nothing more. There was also a punch thrown – but not by Quavo.

So why in the hell is he being depicted as the villain? Where’s the evidence of physical abuse? Are we really living in a society where a man can’t even snatch a bag away from his lady without being called a “monster.” It lacks context.

And once again, I can’t say this enough – she threw a punch at him!

Why isn’t she being held accountable for her decision to use violence against someone she was supposedly in love with?

So what if he cheated? (I’m speculating). He may have even called her a few names on their elevator ride. (Again, I’m speculating).

There’s still no justification for her taking a swing at him, and nearly connecting.

Too often women blame emotion for the fuckery and abuse they inflict on their partners. There’s no accountability – it’s why men lack respect for the opposite sex.

But I’m not accepting anymore bullshit excuses from these witches.

Gender-equality dictates that men and women be evaluated and judged equally for their decisions and actions. Period. No exceptions.

I called a friend to discuss Quavo and Saweetie. We spent 3 hours debating about gender stereotypes and double standards – it was intense.

The conversation didn’t end peacefully like I hoped it would.

In fact, our emotions got so ramped up – from zero to 100 – that we started flinging insults at each other like children on a playground.

Things went COMPLETELY LEFT when she mentioned my mother. (Yeah, she went there.)

“What if some nigga pushed yo mama to the ground like that?” she asked.

“Let’s be accurate,” I responded, “she wasn’t pushed, she lost her footing and fell backwards.”

“That’s because he used all of his strength to pull that bag away from her [saweetie] – the momentum forced her backwards. Stop playing dumb. So imma ask again – what if that was yo mama on camera wrestling with some nigga in an elevator.”

“Well, first of all, my mama would never be in that situation. But if she were, and I saw footage, I’d probably gather more facts before letting my emotions get involved. That’s what mature adults do.”

🤷🏾‍♂‍

I’m still trying to figure out how Quavo is being portrayed as the villainous “toxic male.” If he’s “toxic,” then how should we describe his ex boo?

There are people – mostly women – who watched that video, rewatched it, went to sleep, woke up, watched the video again, drove to work, watched the video a forth time during lunch, went home, watched it again on TMZ, and they still believe poor Quavo deserves all the blame.

It’s mind-blowing 🤯. Honestly, as a man, I’m a little worried.

At this point, it seems fair to say that men will always be judged harshly when they’re involved in domestic disputes, especially when these incidents become physical or violent.

I know a guy who spent weeks in jail because of a domestic violence charge. I’ve also met someone who once called the police on his girlfriend after SHE ATTACKED HIM. Ultimately he was arrested, not her.

Both guys told me the same thing – “nigga, she attacked first!”

I guess it’s okay for a man to be harmed in these situations, or verbally assaulted, but it seems there’s a different set of standards for women who initiate violence against their partners.

The narrative is so biased and one sided that Quavo is being condemned like he’s Ike Turner, even though the video clearly shows that he wasn’t the aggressor.

The backlash he’s getting actually points to a larger issue. It’s disturbing that millions of people have been able to watch a private incident unfold between two former lovers, and worse, there’s dialogue and speculation brewing on Twitter about it.

The expression “mind your own business” seems like comedy in a world that’s dominated by social media.

Chris Brown and Rihanna’s infamous fistfight would’ve probably remained a private matter had it occurred before the birth of Twitter and Facebook, but when photographs of her severely battered face emerged for everyone to see, the altercation and their relationship became fodder for radio hosts, tabloid journalists and social media trolls nationwide.

There was a similar public reaction to the footage that surfaced of rapper Jay Z defending himself against several punches and kicks viciously thrown at him by his sister-in-law Solange Knowles, while his wife, Beyoncé, quietly watched in the corner of an elevator they were all sharing.

The incident generated so much discussion on social media that Beyoncé shrewdly – and perhaps to defend herself – created an album in which she uses a verse to stave off speculation about why the violence between her sister and husband occurred.

The future will likely bring more incidents like these, and people like me will continue to write stories about other people’s personal dramas and relationship woes. It’s a nasty business – but hey, that’s life in 2021.

I know one thing – Derrick Jaxn needs to send Quavo a gift basket. We’d still be clowning his fake ass if elevators didn’t have cameras in them. Just sayin.

cory-haywood-screenshot
Cory A. Haywood

Cory A. Haywood, is a freelance writer and expert on Negro foolishness. Contact him via: coryhaywood@ymail.com and/or visit his blog: www.enterthehat.com, or send him a message on Twitter: @coryahaywood

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