*Kandi Burruss says she struggled with guilt for using a surrogate for her daughter Blaze, who she and husband Todd Tucker welcomed in November.
“We were just trying to figure out like, okay, should we do this? How can you trust somebody with your most precious possession, your most precious gift … somebody that you barely know?” the singer says in the latest episode of Parents magazine’s We Are Family podcast, per PEOPLE.
“But now that it’s all said and done, I wouldn’t change a thing. It was the best decision that we could have made,” adds Burruss.
The “Real Housewives of Atlanta” star also shares 4½-year-old son Ace with Tucker, and she has a 17-year-old daughter from a previous relationship.
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My babies @acetucker & @blazetucker are getting big so fast! Blaze is 8 months old today!
During the interview, Burruss shared some of the questions she and Todd had during the process.
” ‘Are we supposed to talk to her on a regular basis?’ ‘Do we not talk to her?’ ” Burruss says. “We just didn’t really know about how much communication we should have. … I [didn’t] want to seem annoying. But she always made us feel at ease. She always let us know that we never called too much [and] never was bothered by us reaching out. She always volunteered information — she’s like, ‘Oh, I’m feeling a bump today,’ or ‘Oh, this happened.’ “
Burruss also revealed that some of her family members had plenty to say about her using a surrogate, with one asking if she was “concerned [whether she was] going to have a bond with [her] child.”
“It really hurt my feelings because you already know it’s a hard decision to make, to go through a surrogate. But then you’re making me feel bad because you’re saying that I’m not even going to have a bond with my baby … being a woman who has birthed my previous children, [that] automatically was a concern of mine,” she says. “Like, will me and Blaze have the same connection? So I didn’t need somebody else chiming in saying that.”
She went on to note, “If you are a woman who is having physical issues, you may or may not share those with everyone,” she says. “[People] come up with all these [reasons] to [assume] why you need a surrogate.”
“But what I will say is when Blaze got here, I didn’t feel any less of a connection than I have with my previous children,” Burruss adds. “I still feel super bonded when I come in the room. Blaze lights up — her smile is so huge when I walk in there — so it’s still this same love, the same connection.”
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