*It hasn’t always been easy to love the woman that stares back at us through the mirror. How could it when our afros were twisted into six different ponytails in high school while we were surrounded by pretty white kids?
Even the definition of ‘pretty’ back then was the pretty white girl in children’s shows or soap operas.
While we watched these with our mothers back home, we weren’t consoled when we felt ugly on the inside. It took a lot of Black women to realize that their desires were unnatural – which is when they began to feel carefree.
A woman who chose to remain anonymous said that throughout her life she found beauty to be different at home and outside. But as her Blackness expanded as she grew old, she found that the strength in her back, the fullness of her lips, the innocence of her soul in her eyes and the depth of her complexion were unique. She began to fall in love with herself once again and let herself grow out of the toxic perceptions of beauty from her childhood.
Another Black woman called Khalilah shared her experiences with us. She found that the moment she began being her genuine self she started feeling comfortable about the beauty of her natural skin. She realized that when she was able to let go of her insecurities of beauty, she could do a lot more to build the beauty that resonates with her personality. She began aerial yoga, indoor rock-climbing, hiking and ice skating without any worry about her looks. After spending considerable times in these activities, she found that she had now truly begun living a life. And would you know it – she saw beauty in herself again.
Shanel is another woman who found that being carefree doesn’t need approval. She says that being carefree lies in living a life that doesn’t shape itself according to the world’s expectations. Shanel just let go off all standards and opinions that surrounded her and that’s where she began to accept herself for who she is. It took her around 25 years to learn to live with herself – which is why she wants people to know that black teenagers should learn to start early.
Wouldn’t you like to live a carefree life like these women and many others out there? Every personal recollection shared has one common message; happiness comes from within. So let’s start learning to satisfy ourselves from within so we can be truly and eternally carefree.
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